rhymes (part 2)

The Three Little Pigs

The animals i really dig

above all otheris the pig.

pigs are noble, pigs are clever

pigs are courteous. however,

now and then, to break this rule,

one meets a pig who is a fool.

what, for example, would you say

if strolling through the woods one day,

right there in front of you you saw

a pig who's build his house of STRAW?

the wolf who saw it licked his lips,

and said, 'that pig has had his chips.'

'little pig, little pig, let me come in!'

'no, no, by the hairs on my chinny-chin-chin!'

'then i'll huff and i'll puff and i'll blow your house in!'

The little pig began to pray

but wolfie blew his house away.

He shouted, 'bacon, pork and ham!

'oh, what a lucky wolf i am!'

and though he ate the pig quite fast,

he carefully kept his tail till the last.

wolf wandered on, a trifle bloated.

suprise, suprise, for soon he noted

another little house for pigs,

and this one had been build of TWIGS!

'little pig, little pig, let me come in!'
'no, no, by the hairs on my chinny-chin-chin!'
'then i'll huff and i'll puff and i'll blow your house in!'

The wolf said 'okay, here we go!'

he then began to blow and blow.

the little pig began to squeal.

he cried, ' oh wolf, you've had one meal!'

'why can't we talk and make a deal?'
the wolf replied, 'not on your nelly!'

and soon the pig was in his belly.

'two juicy little pigs!' wolf cried,

'but still i am not satisfied!

'i know full well my tummy's bulging,

'but oh, how i adore indulging.'

So creeping quitely as a mouse

the wolf approached another house,

a house which also had inside

a little piggy trying to hide.

but this one, piggy number three

was bright and brainy as could be.

no straw for him, no twigs or sticks.

this pig had build his house of BRICKS

'you'll not get me!' the piggy cried.

'i'll blow you down!' the wolf replied.

'you'll need,' pig said, 'a lot of puff,

'and i don't think you've got enough.'

wolf hiffed and puffed and blew and blew.

the house stayed up as good as new

'if i can't blow it down,' wolf said,

'i'll have to blow it up insted.

'i'll come back dead dead at night

'and blow it up with dynamite!'

pig cried, ' you brute! i might have known!'

then, picking up the telephone,

he dialed as quickly as he could

the number of red ridding hood.

'hello,' she said. 'who's speaking? who?

'oh, hello piggy, how d'you do?'

pig cried, 'i need your help, miss hood!

'oh help me please! d'you think you could?'

'i'll try, of course,'miss hood replied.

'what's on your mind?'...... 'a wolf!' pig cried.

' i know you've dealt with wolves before,

'and now i've got one at my door!'

'my darling pig, ' she said 'my sweet,

'that's something really up my street.

'i've just begun to wash my hair.

'but when it's dry, i'll be right there.'

A short while later, through the wood,

came striding brave miss red ridding hood.

the wolf stood there, his eyes ablaze

and yellowish, like mayonnaise.

his teeth were sharp, his gums were raw,

and spit was dripping from his jaw.

one more the maiden's eyelid flickers.

she draws the pistol from her knickers

and kills him with a single shot.

pig, peeping through the window, stood

and yelled, 'well done, miss ridding hood!'

Ah, piglet, you must never trust

young ladies from the upper crust.

for now, miss riding hood, one notes

not only has two wolfskin coats

but when she goes from place to place,

she has a PIGSKIN TRAVELLING CASE.

from revolting rhymes by Roald Dahl